Project Description

Read the transcript

Hi there, mama. Do you feel tired but have no idea how to nourish yourself? Longing for more restful moments throughout your day without the need to perform care for anyone else, but just for yourself where you are feeling comfortable, cozy, and warmly nourished with the same peaceful energy, like falling asleep, is that your little one?

Every mom needs those refreshing moments throughout the day, but having to wait until the end of the. When you can’t stand anymore, each of my self kiss snippets will give you that quiet peace that you carry in your pocket. Listen to at any time during your day, wherever you are, while waiting in the line, the supermarket, while holding you crying darling, and trying to keep you cool or walking in nature, allow yourself that moment to calm your heartbeat down, to get the patient presence you want to be.

Let’s make you relax and feel comfy.

Do you want to know how to let go of this incredible, exhausting desire to be perfect, to be perfect at home as a mom and also in our professional life? Today I am going to share some very personal thoughts about my own desire to be, to be perfect and when I start to think about it, I don’t think that I was aware of how hard I tried to be perfect, and when I’m asking myself where this is coming from, then I come to a very vulnerable little me thinking I’m not good enough. And I don’t think we have to go, so deep into our childhood or look in all of the details of our, previous years, but at some point we must have made the experience that we have to work hard, that we, didn’t develop the capacity to sense our boundaries. To sense our limits, and also to really connect with our body.

So at some point we must have lost or, at least, forgotten to trust ourself and to be connected because if we are connected with our inner wisdom, with our intuition, and if we are listening to the signals of our body that are constantly there. Then how can we cross our limits and how can we desire to be perfect, which is an illusion and not only an illusion, but it doesn’t really make sense.

What is the joy of being perfect? So, for me, and also what I realized when working with moms in my one-on-one coachings or hypnotherapy sessions that we all have this desire to be perfect because we want to protect ourself. If we show up as the amazing mom. That is never doing anything wrong, then we secretly desire not to be criticized and not to be judged.

And at the end of the day, we all want to be loved. We all want to be accepted. But what is, in my experience, our deepest desire, and that’s true for us moms, for us adults, and also for our little ones, is that we want to be seen, that we want to be seen as we truly are, that we want to be accepted and loved for our true self.

And for those of you that know me, I have a deep belief that we all come here for a reason, for a purpose, and when we make the experience in our early lives, and that’s why I think the first years matter so much. If we make the experience that we are not okay the way we are, then we start to build those misconceptions, and one is that we have to work hard to be okay, that we have to cross our limits to constantly perform to be enough, and so we try to be as perfect as possible to make it right, to belong, to be accepted, to feel seen, and to be needed.

So what helps us the most to come out of this incredible, exhausting, hamster wheel to be perfect, to show up like ideal mothers and a professional, successful working woman is to be self-aware, to be aware of our need, to be accepted, our need to feel seen.

And we can’t expect from anyone else to get this feeling of being wonderful, being enough.

We can only give ourself the value and we can do this through self-compassion. So what I want you to take home from this episode is to check in with yourself every time you feel tired, every time you feel it is too much. Every time you feel overwhelmed to check in with yourself and ask yourself, who am I doing this for? And if you come to an inner voice that tells you to be accepted, to be loved, then tell yourself a different story.

Tell yourself I am enough. I am wonderful. I am powerful. I am an incredible loving mother. I am an amazing working woman. I am creative. I’m courageous. I’m openhearted. Tell yourself I am safe. I’m connected. I’m grounded. I am free.

And observe what change within yourself. Every time you tell yourself those encouraging positive words, observe how your mindset, your wellbeing, change from feeling uncapable. inadequate to being able to go into the world to be vulnerable and powerful at the same time. To allow yourself the rest and the inner peace you need to feel. To feel good, to feel all is good and to be connected.

From brain science. We know that if we are in a state of inner stress, we can’t connect with a child or our colleagues or other family members or friend in the way we want to because if we don’t feel safe, if we are stressed.

Because if we are stressed, we don’t feel safe. And if we don’t feel safe, our brain isn’t functioning a hundred percent. It’s just in the state of protecting ourself. So we first have to calm down to come to this state of inner peace. To fully engage with others, to be empathetic, to be compassionate. And I know the hardest part is to connect with ourself to calm down again.

And one way to do so is really to check in with yourself and to ask yourself, how am I doing right now? And if you sense that you are stressed out, tell yourself some words full of compassion. Something like, I totally see that you are stressed right now, and I totally understand that it’s hard for you to calm down.

And the moment we experience this self-compassion and the moment we experience those empathetic words, we start to feel safe and we start to calm down.

So every time you notice that you want to be the best, you want to be perfect, allow yourself some words filled with compassion, some empathetic words. Such as I see you really want to be perfect, and I also see how hard you work to make it right, to make it right for your kids, for your child, your children, and to make it right for your clients or for the company you are working with.

You are doing wonderful.

In the moment you give yourself those words filled with compassion. Observe how your state of mind can relax and even if it is just a little bit and can calm down, and we need this state of inner calm to be more present rather than working so hard to be perfect, to allow yourself to be rather than to do all the time.

And let me share one of my observations I made when every time when I’m working with, either a family coach, parent coach, or a therapist or educator, I observe that there is a gap between what they are talking about and what they are living. So we all have the desire to be perfect. And we all tend to show up as perfect moms or professionals because we all have the desire to, to be accepted, to be good, to be loved.

And that is why it is so important for me to share what’s going on within myself because I’m cooking with water too. And I want you to trust yourself. I want you to know you are not the only one feeling not good enough. There wouldn’t be so many people out there trying to be perfect, showing up as perfect. Showing a mask. This is just a sign that we all have the same desire to be good enough.

Trust yourself and trust that you are not the only one.

So for today, I want you to really internalize those positive words, that you are enough, that you are a wonderful, wonderful, loving mother and that you are an amazing woman that has the desire to give it all and the right to live it all.

And please share your thoughts with me. Let me know what you are struggling with. And what it is that makes you trying to be perfect.

Until next time, take the best care.

Mama, would you like some life-changing one-on-one support with me to help you become the joyful, successful, fulfilled mom and woman you have always wanted to be? Then head over to my website beginning to sign up for a free discovery session today, your future self with thank you. Until next time, take the best care and don’t forget to let your gift shine.

You are amazing.

You may also enjoy …